You don't get to choose your family...

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Hilary Rodham Clinton wrote a book when she was the First Lady titled, "It Takes a Village to Raise a Child: And Other Lessons Children Teach Us". Although I never read the book the title always resonated within me; The thought of the village mostly. I am an only child and like the title of this blog... You don't get to choose your family.

I would have LOVED to have other siblings, but that wasn't a choice I was able to make. I reached out for this "sibling companionship" through friends and cousins. At a young age I began to make MY own village. For whatever reason (I know why... Just not gonna post it), I always felt a lil different, in "black sheep" sort of way in my family. These feelings were brought on by different family members throughout the years. And as those feeling developed, so did the distance in relationships. As a result of this my village grew bigger. Why? Because not only am I looking to have a sibling connection, I would also like to have a family one too. So teachers and counselors, friends of friends, and the family members of my friends were added to my village. They were people whom I connected with. And this cycle goes on and on. Through my teenage years when I didn't want to hear ANYTHING my parents were talking about... There was another addition to the village. After meeting my half siblings and biological father and not having the connection I'd longed for with them from a young age... another addition was added...

Around my 21st birthday I began to assemble my tribe of elders. These were strong men and women who I felt were really wise. I go to them for spiritual advice, as well as advice about my career, education, love and money. I am sooo grateful for them.

Now don't get it twisted. I am NOT saying the village members replace or erase the family God has chosen for you. And I say always ALWAYS try to nurse a bad relationship back to health, but once you feel like you're at a dead end... begin to seek village members.  **And not all village members stay with you throughout your life. Sometimes they have to get voted off the island. **

You don't get to choose your family BUT you do get to choose your village! Whether you realize it or not you too have a village. I would advise everyone to assemble a tribe of elders because they can guide you in the right direction and keep you from making the same mistakes they did. Will you still make mistakes?? OF COURSE you will, but at least you will have people there to help you analyze them.

I would like to thank every member of my village! You mean the world to me!

I can't WAIT to be chosen to be in someone's village!!!
~AE

P.S. Even though there are a LOT of broken companionships and connections... I pray DAILY for a reconnection. What can I say... I'm a lover not a fighter. :-)